the night of wonders it was all a daze.
who'd figure youd find me through this maze.
made your approach and caught my eye danced all nite and said our goodbyes
his swag needed work but his eyes said it all
i saw the man he truely was and the one he wanted to become
our nights together ended wit the sunrise and breakfast
it was the bedtime stories and goodnite kisses that we're as sweet as honey
i watched him evolve to a better man.
Why do girls always want credit for affecting you?? They always want to impose and assume shit
yeah this girl saw right through me but my swag didnt need work
I turned that shit off cuz i slept over the second night.
SMH yo
Iite i just woke up and i feel like i got up in the wrong side of the bed this mornin
nothing's wrong i just feel different, a good different
i remember watching this documentary
jawn put me to sleep but it was insightful
it was called "the secret" it says that physics
and the mental is a key part in getting your desires
it says that thinking in a certain way (almost presumptuously) will get you what you want, almost like you have a gravitational pull. What you desire will gravitate towards you. Anyway some part of the document says that Music in the morning helps put you in a good mood for the whole day. Today when i woke up i listened to foxy brown's "too real" and i just snapped back to my i don't give a fuck looking out for number 1 mode
I been through so much changes in my life mostly through addition or straight swapping
Lemme tell you bout me before
I was very apathetic, i didnt care about shiiit.... i didnt care about my past present and future. I was just sliding by which in itself isn't good but i tend to care too much about shit nowadays. What's she doin, what they doin, when who why where...i gave a fuck about people again. I started to rely on folks for my happiness. Me being in a new town havin no body i started hangin on to whoever i could talk to. Loneliness would do that to you. But that song made me not give a fuck it returned a familiar feeling which in turn brought me back to the state where i didnt give a fuck in general. I feel good because i really needed this imna go down kiss moms good mornin (i never do that), play ball till i cant walk, cook and eat some bangin lasagna. Its gonna be a good day...
Sometimes i go on these huge streaks of confidence and i feel like the king of the world. Its always been my dream to take over the world by the way. Not to be ruler or an actual king but to be able to go anywhere i wanted, to be able to do whatever whereever i want no matter what jurisdiction. The world as my personal playground lol. Ive always loved doin me thats why i cant imagine myself tied up with someone. Im probably gonna keep doin me regardless and it wont be pretty.
(4 hours later came back from playin ball)
Im feelin mad good rite now niggaz gotta keep it up i just went 3-1 for the day (got tired)
stay tuned
LOL. I feel like the Wolf in these cartoons.
Well every dude is like the wolf in these cartoons.
When we see a certain female (or any female) we go bonkers. Well not as bonkers as the wolf but its a cartoon its meant to be super expressive but even so most dudes can relate. Either we trip up our words or we act like "supahsprungman" or sum shit doin whatever we can to get the object of our desires. When we act like that its up to the subject to decide what to do or what not to do with what we projecting. you go bonkers over a broad usually it wont end well. Thats why the wolf over there gettin chased by the grandma. Because the red head did what she did with "all that". She played him into goin up to sum penthouse she wasnt gonna be at. Niggaz need to learn tact and calm rationale when dealing with our lil brain (as opposed to our big brain).
We'd get into less trouble (HIV.AIDS.Makin babies, fuckin minors) and we'd be more respected. We are a bit oversexed not that thats a bad thing (i know i like it) but its to the point where its hurtnin us as a demographic in the eyes of everyone else. Lets face it Black Women in general hold us in a negative light and they the same race as us. "Niggaz aint shit" "money make me cum" what else umm ohh yeah "fuck niggaz", " i want me a white man". Meanwhile we are scrutinized and stereotypically linked to laziness, unambitiousness, unresponsiblity and a poor moral code (stop snitching, super materialism, what we do to our women).
When i saw this cartoon i thought of myself cuz i luv females as much as the next nigga probably more rite now; and in my head im thinkin "we are all like this!!". whistling at bitches, catcalls, seeing a chick on the street and thinkin bout the nastiest thing you can do with what she workin with.
Men are Wolves yo.
We are wolves and chicks are coyotes. Although there are some chicks who can howl at the moon like us or can even understand our barks and bites the difference is evident.
Niggaz, we are the baddest wolves out, to the point where our animal insticts can actually win over rationale. Other races are wolves too (well maybe not indian dudes they get no pussy lol). But to me lookin at the society im a part of (black men) most of the shit we do is for girls. We get chains for girls, we get fancy whips for girls, we get the high end gear to look fly for the GIRLs. I dont think any other race goes out of thier way like we do. I remember my boy talkin couple years back about gettin a whip so he can have his passenger side window rolled down so that niggaz can see the bitches hes rollin with. Im like ??? all that shit just for that. You know me i dont like to try hard socially so maybe thats why im lonely as fuck rite now. We do some shit al for the lust.
Lust is instilled in us and sometimes it comsumes us like a curse. Coyotes need to understand our nature and learn to deal in a new way becasue im tired of hearin black girls complainin about what they been through with some random nigga and projecting her bad experience into the general populus. Although I too am a wolf Im different if it is not evident in this blog then you are blind. Some of these girls know how to bring us out the woods though; showin all types of skin accentuating their features. its no excuse for wrong to happen to them im just saying: "If you bleeding in the water sharks will come" lol.
Im not sayin that they should forgive the dumb shit we do. Im just sayin be smart about who you fuck with. A wolf who doesnt seem like all the others doesnt make him less the wolf ya digg. He probably like the wolf in the other cartoon smart, cunning and a sophist (me). Dude was civilizing the other wolf tellin him how to live in the city and shit. Tellin him to subdue his banal instincts but eventuallyyy a wolf is a wolf even if he talks like some "city" dude he still went buck when he saw the country girl. **Thats me also i luvs me a southern chick! Talkin with that accent n all lol thats why i dig philly chicks lol, i wanna hear em moan in that accent!!..!!** *Ahem* but yeah Niggaz is wolves yo and we do what we do yall just need to be smart about how to deal with us.
aids increased by 40 percent ::: SMH
lol speechless
ahh well im over the point of being supersprung, i think its best that i avoid anything that will make my dick move at all, cuz this is gettin crazy. I had a dream and homegirl was in it. her tits were bigger though and she was fuckin someone else, i wound up killing dude by strangulation I chopped his body up and put it in a duffell bag and i buried it in the same spot he was killed lol i/we got caught. a buncha friends from all over was in it too. is there something wrong with me lol. truth is that im putting way too much of myself into her (not the was i would like). I shouldnt be dreamin of her thats OD, but it is what it is. of all the girls ive bagged over here shes the only one i can see myself with truly. Now ive made it a point not to talk about her on here because i just may get too comfortable and give someone the link to this journal and i can be a bit gaurded of someone who hits close to the heart. In some ways im protectin my heart ya feel me.
I do need to chill though because i havent seen her enough times to be feelin this way. She gets me in other ways though, chill conversation, deep conversation, comfortable silence. We'd be talkin for hours at night, like about 5 hours on average im guessing. She smart, sext down to earth and has the ability to better myself, im type scared cuz im goin to school in albany for a semester and chances are that if (when) my lips touch hers ima be sprung officially which may lead to whatever. Most likely nothin then come december i find out she seein someone, i shouldnt think so negatively but shit tends so go that way for me and girls...look what happened on thursday (yesterdays blog). Iuuno what to do, i have less than a month left here and im finna take her somewhere im done asking. Her gaurded self is just gonna have to get over that. Theres a whole other side to shit that i dont know yet. I forget/has no idea how she walks, how her mouth moves when she talk, her explanatory style all that is foggy or blank, i didnt wanna rush her but maybe i did that to a fault. However with this type of thing slow may be better but fuck this is mutated snailturtle slow
