ahhh shit
I'm beginning to understand my ways when it comes to my social interaction with the fairer sex. When I'm feeling someone, i'm feeling em but when I am turned off or i can't see myself with them anymore i douse our bridge in kerosene and i light a match. In one fell swoop a couple of paragraphs i can damage a relationship (in the general social sense of the word) to a point where it cannot be repaired. I just go into fuck it mode and say things or do things that blow it all the fuck up. As I grow I've been doing this more and more, especially if any hope is lost. I'm starting to feel that this is the case right now. Someone is feeling themselves too much and has demonstrated that they have a history of getting dudes to feel a certain way just to play them in the end. She stays telling me about it. Oh homie does this but i deaded him, fella does that and he loves me (big lol after the sentance) and not to mention the EX thing ....jeeze. Besides the long distance thing defenitely isn't my flow so why not go all pyro.
After that I was like "damn if I was exclusive to her at that certain point in time (last semester of school) I would be kicking myself in tha ass right now." So today again she mentions the nigga, as she goes on i cut her off and say imna watch the game [tosses match into the gasoline drenched bridge], she got all upset and said it was rude but damn im not trying to be like them other suckers in ya life and im damn sure not trying to be hearing about ya ex for the umpteemth day in a row...
I do this
I do this to cut losses
I do this to prove that no one isnt expendable and to demonstrate my strength, so much people are guilty of keeping the wrong people in their lives on borrowed time, fucking up their lives even more so I'm treatin it like a band-aid rip that shit right off...
Time waits for no one, while ones mind is wrapped around the wrong person, you could be missing out on someone else...
and I hate missing out
Relationships are never a threat cuz i'll erase the history and act like we've never met.
- Joe Budden
is this one worth keeping though?? Maybe....we'll see
I dont have to rebuild a bridge the same way it was before...it just gotta be there...right????
They say gods in the building nah.....DonDons in the building
UUUUUGGGHHH
-chix are so fuckin wierd. I feel like im still learning their pathology. The blogs help but everyone is different and some behaviors i just do not understand. Well i do understand them but I don't get why these behaviors are on display so blantantly ...you know i'm right here right! I'm defenitely about to go our bridge with some kerosene and a torch lighter cuz I'm officially turned the ufck off.
- fuck me i gotta take the GRE's again, and i can't take em again for like another month so ...there goes fall semester. Why can't i do anything right the first time. Whatever, I don't lose twice.
- I wish to be someone when i grow up (more). I shoulda went into radiology. I was at careerbuilder [yess at 2am in the morning] and some lucky radiologist with at least one year of experience will get paid 230K to 300K per year. I wish ... you know what fuck wishing...it won't do me anygood.
- Mo betta blues is the shit! brooklyn brownstones god i want to live in one lol. There's nothing like em.
- I think my dog may be a shizhu mix or and akita mix. he has the wierd curly tail and his eyes are chinky lol... if such a characterization applies to dogs.
- Speaking of burning bridges About the homegirl i had a dream about. I finally reached out to her. Although we weren't together for long we went through some shit and I have make her trust me again apparently. Apparently she forgot that she was part of the reason why we ended up the way we did. [fuckin lifestyles, almost fucked my life style up]. I'm not gonna charles hamilton her so ima leave it at that.
- MMA fighting is the shit. I was into it when I was a youngin but the new game that came out made me a fan again. Wanderlei Silva is that nigga. Hopefully he whoops ass this june 13th. I wonder if i can be a Mixed Martial Arts fighter. I haven't fought anyone in a minute. I do feel like fuckin some people up though. Who knows where life takes you but then again I'm in philadelphia so looks like I'm staying put.
Phuck Philly
yess im still on that
Exile:
Mainstream hip-hop at the moment has one face. One face is easier to sell than many. People are lazy and settle for what’s thrown in there face. Most people will just eat McDonalds instead of searching for that perfect restaurant. Same for music these days, people settle for what the radio says is hot because its safe and easy. But this gives creative hip hoppers a chance to thrive, since the majority ain’t doin nuthin new……I see change but the peaceful revolution cant happen without unity, and more people are becoming aware of this.
Do u hear that???
Soul Amazin got damn....ear candy
OR down....
I came to a realization that I've been lazy when it comes to goin to the gym and getting active. Most people who know me know me as a gym rat. I was always on the way to the gym/ or comming out of the gym. Now i barely go 3 times a week, its gotten bad. Its because i've become comfortable with the way i look which is OK but its not good. I have a goal and i havent reached it yet and going backwards is the last thing i want to do. I was in the gym today and it dawned on me that i could have put on weight and that scared the shit out of me, cuz i PUT IN soooo much work to get to where i was and i dont wanna start over. I just wanna remain ignit on the fact that i put on so i can take off without the feeling of starting over. Cuz whether i did or not summer is coming up and ima loose it all over again anyway. I gotta hit the mark and slay the demon nah mean.
I gotta eat better cuz im not advancing like i used to. Niggas is tryin to add muscle too and its hard to do that on oreos and ice cream.
I gotta attend the gym like i used to (Every fucking day)
I can forgive myself for relaxing off but I gotta be better to myself and not let it happen again. I cant be weak
Yeah I don't do this often, well once but homegirl was special and she moved me. Janelle Monae's album was the truth! Not to mention she was/is sexy as fuck... Anyway this nigga rite here he goes by the name of Blu and his mixtape " Her Favorite Colo(u)r " is basically an unbelievable roadtrip down auditory lane. Shit is EAR CANDY! supposedly this is the first project he's done where he's produced a whole album/mixtape. The jazz overtones/undertones that lace this album is so well put together and C.R.E.A.T.I.V.E. something thats really lacking today in music. Even the people in the mainstream that are called creative are clones of somebody [Drake= Lil wayne; Kid Cudi= Kanye] this nigga here is a whole nother animal. Shit and ive only listened to that mixtape, lemme listen to the rest of his shit.
Speaking of the music industry, this nigga is called an underground artist but in reality most people who arent. Neyo, Beyonce, Ciara, TI, Jeezy, Cudi, Kanye, Wayne and Drake, Jay-Z ummm who else TPAIN, Akon, Trey songs?? nahh umm yeah people like that [Keri Hilson] you are basically and underground artist. You can take two random names from my list and u can bet that these niggas have collabbed on an record I swear record companies have niggas on rotation [Rihanna] [dream] all for the sake of brainwashing and money. When art gets ignored.
SIGH
Anyway...check homie out.
